Why is it important to take care of ourselves?

We often hear from all sides that we should be a better parent, partner, and colleague, work on ourselves, break toxic relationships, become aware of the causes of the problems we think we have… the list of what we need to do to become better and feel better is a long one. 

We also hear how important it is, on the path to achieving any goal, to dedicate time to ourselves, but this is advice many will postpone for some “easier” time - when the children grow up or at least until the next promotion. However, this advice is truly important in principle, and we must become aware that it is extremely important to apply it in practice too, so read on to find out why it is important and desirable to put yourself first and what the consequences are of neglecting your own needs.

What does it really mean to be kind to yourself?

In today’s fast-paced life, self-care is treated as a luxury reserved for those who have plenty of free time. However, it goes far beyond indulging yourself and is much more than fragrant baths, massages, and meditation. It is about nurturing the most important relationship you will have in life — the one with yourself.

Before reexamining relationships with others that drain your energy, ask yourself what you are like toward yourself.  Do you sometimes forget to eat? Are you kinder to others than to yourself? Do you feel guilty when you are not productive? If you recognize yourself in this behavior, it is possible that you were taught to accept yourself through achievements and through how good you are to others. The consequence is that you do not recognize your own needs, but instead see yourself through the expectations of others, rushing from one role to another “on autopilot.”

Don’t let yourself burn out

The essence is that it is difficult to fulfill any life role well if we neglect our own needs. Part of caring for and loving others is first loving ourselves, and that means putting self-care first. Time dedicated to yourself and clearly set boundaries will help you cope more easily with everyday obligations and prevent you from “burning out” under the weight of responsibilities. 

Here are a few tips on how to care for your “inner child”:

Ask yourself how you are: Would you allow your child to be hungry or knowingly deprive them of sleep? Certainly not, and therefore do not do that to yourself. Listen to your body and mind so you can meet basic needs for sleep, food, and a positive environment.

Set boundaries: This is one of the most important ways to care for yourself, and it consists of clearly communicating your expectations to others and insisting that they be consistently respected. For example, no phone calls after 10 p.m., do not pay attention to advice you did not ask for, no lending money, etc. This also includes the famous “no,” which is not always easy to say, but is very important when you need time for yourself or when something is draining you.

Don’t be “white knights”:  In psychology, the white knight syndrome refers to people who have a constant need to “fix” other people, especially in romantic relationships. Spending time and energy helping others often leads “saviors” to burnout.

Rest is OK: It is important to accept that you do not have to be productive all the time. Allow yourself to rest without feeling guilty. Set aside a moment each day for reflection, recharging, and activities that bring joy and fulfillment – a good book, a TV series, a warm bath, a massage, or a cup of coffee you will enjoy in complete peace.

Also, the way you behave toward yourself often affects how others will treat you. When you prioritize self-care and devote time to your well-being, you send a message to the people around you that your needs are valid and deserve attention, which is a good foundation for building quality relationships.

In addition, be aware that when you consistently prioritize your own needs and engage in activities aligned with your values, you also strengthen your self-confidence, and we know how important that is for achieving goals. So, don’t put yourself on “hold” — make time and devote yourself to yourself!